Sweetest love, what a gift to hear your musings on my most beloved topic, and what an honour to be considered a thinker you admire! I blush at the thought 🥰
You speak to so much forgotten wisdom; Death is supposed to be nourishing, all Death. I highly recommend watching Caitlin Doughty visiting the Human Composting Facility, where it’s possible for you to literally be given earth made from your beloveds (https://mrtroyford.substack.com/p/notes-from-the-alley-4)
We are exclusively neurotic—there’s a whole evolutionary psychology theory called ‘Terror Management Theory’, and it pretty much presupposes that literally everything that humans do, create, believe in—everything—it’s all just creative ways to stop ourselves from thinking about Death. Personally, I think they go a little overboard, I don’t think that all art & all religion is about avoiding mortality salience; but it’s interesting that such a school of thought that exists…
Death illuminates and clarifies. Stephen Jenkinson (my mentor, unknown) tells a profound story in Die Wise, where he gets a call from a hospice nurse who’s been given a terminal diagnosis. He’s the ultimate Death-guide, so they talk a little, and he suggests she take a few days to let the news settle and then call him again. She calls him back a few days later and, low & behold, the doctors had given her the wrong results. She was going to be fine. They sat in silence for a minute and he asked her how she was feeling—she just let out a primal wail, she was keening, and not with relief. Once settled she explained that for just a few days, everything was crystallised, she saw everything for what it truly was for the first time. Everything was miraculous. And she felt as though, with the correction of her diagnosis, that that had been stolen from her…
I would love to see Fat Ham, it sounds incredible. Did you ever see The Cook, The Thief, His Wife & Her Lover? Your description of Fat Ham brought it to mind…
Thank you again for your exceptionally kind words, my love. Oh and your poetry! Thank you, thank you for your poetry…
Wow, you are a veritable FOUNTAIN of wisdom, my love!! I'm deeply moved by Stephen Jenkinson's story about the hospice nurse, and her sense of clarity and truth she derived from her (temporary) terminal diagnosis. And my talented friends Parker and Lily were in an immersive staging of "The Cook, The Thief, His Wife & Her Lover" a few years back in Miami! I cannot wait to see you again and discuss all things art, death, and birds. Thank you for the gift of your being. xx
When I worked as a hospice volunteer, I remembered and found that the words of Ram Das were true: "When you are in the presence of someone near death, you are in the presence of Truth." Of course, we all are nearer to death than we like to think, and in the presence of Truth, if only we could see it. Thanks for shining your light in this place that is not as dark as we are led to believe.
Wow, thank you so much for sharing your experience Charlie. I can only imagine how illuminating and often challenging your time as a hospice volunteer must have been. I love the idea of Death ferrying us closer to Truth. Thank you for your insights and generosity. xx
I've been listening to this song on repeat the last days... it feels to me like a warm embrace for the full spectrum of being human - death, longing and everything in between. "How beautiful it is to even exist." <3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dzNvk80XY9s
I never thought I'd see the day that you quoted Barbie, but I have to say, it's really working for you. And as someone who approaches unknowns with you frequently, it's nice to know I'm now in good company with your readers.
Sweetest love, what a gift to hear your musings on my most beloved topic, and what an honour to be considered a thinker you admire! I blush at the thought 🥰
You speak to so much forgotten wisdom; Death is supposed to be nourishing, all Death. I highly recommend watching Caitlin Doughty visiting the Human Composting Facility, where it’s possible for you to literally be given earth made from your beloveds (https://mrtroyford.substack.com/p/notes-from-the-alley-4)
We are exclusively neurotic—there’s a whole evolutionary psychology theory called ‘Terror Management Theory’, and it pretty much presupposes that literally everything that humans do, create, believe in—everything—it’s all just creative ways to stop ourselves from thinking about Death. Personally, I think they go a little overboard, I don’t think that all art & all religion is about avoiding mortality salience; but it’s interesting that such a school of thought that exists…
Death illuminates and clarifies. Stephen Jenkinson (my mentor, unknown) tells a profound story in Die Wise, where he gets a call from a hospice nurse who’s been given a terminal diagnosis. He’s the ultimate Death-guide, so they talk a little, and he suggests she take a few days to let the news settle and then call him again. She calls him back a few days later and, low & behold, the doctors had given her the wrong results. She was going to be fine. They sat in silence for a minute and he asked her how she was feeling—she just let out a primal wail, she was keening, and not with relief. Once settled she explained that for just a few days, everything was crystallised, she saw everything for what it truly was for the first time. Everything was miraculous. And she felt as though, with the correction of her diagnosis, that that had been stolen from her…
I would love to see Fat Ham, it sounds incredible. Did you ever see The Cook, The Thief, His Wife & Her Lover? Your description of Fat Ham brought it to mind…
Thank you again for your exceptionally kind words, my love. Oh and your poetry! Thank you, thank you for your poetry…
Wow, you are a veritable FOUNTAIN of wisdom, my love!! I'm deeply moved by Stephen Jenkinson's story about the hospice nurse, and her sense of clarity and truth she derived from her (temporary) terminal diagnosis. And my talented friends Parker and Lily were in an immersive staging of "The Cook, The Thief, His Wife & Her Lover" a few years back in Miami! I cannot wait to see you again and discuss all things art, death, and birds. Thank you for the gift of your being. xx
When I worked as a hospice volunteer, I remembered and found that the words of Ram Das were true: "When you are in the presence of someone near death, you are in the presence of Truth." Of course, we all are nearer to death than we like to think, and in the presence of Truth, if only we could see it. Thanks for shining your light in this place that is not as dark as we are led to believe.
Wow, thank you so much for sharing your experience Charlie. I can only imagine how illuminating and often challenging your time as a hospice volunteer must have been. I love the idea of Death ferrying us closer to Truth. Thank you for your insights and generosity. xx
What a beautiful piece. Thank you!
Thank you my love! It's an honor to have your eyes and ears on my words :)
I've been listening to this song on repeat the last days... it feels to me like a warm embrace for the full spectrum of being human - death, longing and everything in between. "How beautiful it is to even exist." <3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dzNvk80XY9s
This song is gorgeous, and I can imagine you whirling through space as you play it! Thank you for this exceptional gift, my love. xx
I’ve been thinking about death too! 💀 Loooove your take here. Gorgeous writing!
Oooooh we must get together and discuss!! Thank you so much for reading, my love! xx
I never thought I'd see the day that you quoted Barbie, but I have to say, it's really working for you. And as someone who approaches unknowns with you frequently, it's nice to know I'm now in good company with your readers.